#4's 4th birthday

We've never really been big on birthday celebrations so #4's birthday was just a family affair.  She got to open gifts, watch Frozen, and choose where we ate dinner.  She chose Jason's Deli.  For the salad bar.  And she got an ice cream cake, although we didn't get any pictures of it because we had to wait until Sunday to get it for her.  She hasn't stopped playing with her news toys yet.  Always a plus! 

Hard to believe our munchkin is four, but we're not sad about it either!  She continues to love to cuddle and is starting to come up with the funniest things to say.  She is coming out of her shell a little bit around strangers, but she still isn't completely comfortable with new situations and new people.  She still wavers between wanting to "do school" like her big sisters and being happy having all the toys to herself while they are working.  I'm enjoying watching her come out of the toddler stage and enter into the little kids stage.

Field trip to the farm and the State Capital

I felt pretty awful all week last week, but we did manage to get school done every day and had a field trip to a farm and the older two went with Hubby to the state capital with TeenPact.

First the farm.  The directions we had to the place were perfect, but I drove past it the first time because it looked like someone's home, not necessarily a farm.  After confirming with a friend that it was indeed the place we went back.  We were the first ones there so when I approached the man in the yard I told him we were there for the field trip with Bayou Cajun Homeschoolers.  He looked at me like he didn't have a clue what I was talking about.  I think if I hadn't confirmed it with my friend that I was in the right place I would have assumed that I just drove up to a random house and told them I was there for a field trip.  I finally found someone who knew we were coming and decided we were in the right place.   After that bit of awkwardness we were good to go.

First we learned about different types of farms and why they are so important.

Then we got to see piglets that were about 4 weeks old.  They really do scream like little babies when they are upset.  Not pleasant, even when you know they aren't really in distress.

These guys were about 4 months old.  And they reminded us that piglets may be cute, but grown pigs really do stink.  A lot.

The girls got to bottle feed some baby animals

After looking at the animals we were taken to the horses.  All the girls got to ride at least once, and some of them rode twice.  I got to lead one of the horses.  In my tennis shoes.  Trust me when I say that people who work on farms wear boots for more than a fashion statement!

#1

#2

#4 with #1 walking along beside her

Me leading #3

After riding the horses we got to go on a hayride.  At one point the girls were given a sticker that said, "I met a farmer today."  After the hayride I told the man that we should have all gotten stickers that read, "I survived the hayride of 2014!"  The driver, who was probably at least in his 70s, drove like the tractor was a four wheeler.  And the rest of us hung on for dear life.  One of the other moms who had been at the farm for something else said that when they went on a night-time ride that he actually drove even faster.  I think it would have been fine if we had been prepared, but we hadn't placed the children quite securely enough to be completely comfortable.  But we all survived.  And the girls thought it was awesome.

The girls also got to pet and hold rabbits. 

We also had to settle an argument about whether this rooster was real or not.  I thought it was real.  I was wrong.

We ended the morning by eating lunch there with a few of the other families.  We really enjoyed our time and the time we got to spend with friends.  But I'm really looking forward to our trip to the strawberry farm in a week!

#1 and #2 also finally had their day at the state capital with Hubby.  They both really enjoyed it and Hubby thought it was an excellent learning experience for them as well.  I love the idea of getting our girls involved in their government, even as young as they are.  I also love that they have 4 day classes for older kids that count towards a civics credit in highschool! 

They just happen to be wearing the skirts that I made with the help of my friend.  Well, she completely made #2's and most of #1's, but I did finish #1's by myself.  And I think I could do it again.  Everyone was right, skirts are pretty easy to make. 

Our First Homeschool Camp

A Church of Christ Homeschool Camp.  We were initially very excited to find this camp.  But for whatever reason as time went on, Hubby and I started to have some reservations about the camp.  We were going in to an unknown and didn't know what to expect.  We decided about a week before we left that we needed to have a more positive attitude about going, but we still weren't super excited about it.  We were going for the kids and that was about it.

Boy were we wrong!  It didn't take more than a few hours at the camp to realize that not only were our kids going to have a great week, but we were going to be blessed as well.

First, everyone was unbelievably friendly.  I don't have a problem meeting new people, but it is helpful when you go in to a new place and every single person you see introduces themselves and has a genuine interest in meeting you.  There were a lot of people who knew each other from previous camps, but also a lot of new people.  We met a lot of people that we are going to enjoy staying in contact with, even though we don't live close to each other.

The facilities were fantastic.   Hubby did have to stay in a different cabin even though it was a family camp.  But we knew that going in.  However, the girls and I were able to stay in a cabin with our friends from Houston.  We were also very close to the bathroom.  That was a huge deal!  They did that for us since we had two little kids.  I'm going to beg each year to be that close to the bathroom.  It made my life a million times easier since I was completely in charge of bathroom/shower duty for all four girls.  And we had heat/ac in the cabins as well.  Good thing since the first night got down to freezing!

The only picture I took all week!

The teenagers who were there were exactly the role models we want for our girls.  I am fully aware that no child is perfect, but Hubby and I were extremely impressed with the older kids who were at this camp.  We sat behind a couple rows of them in the worship services and they were actively engaged in singing, praying, and taking notes during the lessons.  Hubby overheard a couple of girls saying that even though they hadn't actually studied for the Bible Bowl activities that they might as well do it since they were there.  These are the kind of girls that we want our girls to look up to.  And eventually these are the young men we want our daughters to look to for future mates.  It was refreshing to be reminded that all hope is not lost for the future generations!

There was a time for the moms to get together to encourage one another.  Not only was I encouraged talking to other homeschool Moms, I found out some great resources for our school.  I love talking with other homeschool Moms.  They have a wealth of information just waiting to be tapped.  Hopefully I was also able to encourage and help some of the other Moms as well.

The worship.  I know this idea is foreign to people who aren't a part of the Church of Christ, and even a lot of people who grew up in the church disagree with me, but acapella music is awesome.  Give me 200 Christians sitting shoulder to shoulder singing with just their voices instead of having a praise band.  Every.  Time.  I got chills the first time we sang together.  I had pretty much lost my voice by the end of the camp, but it didn't matter because you couldn't really hear yourself singing anyway.  They recorded the singing this year and we are really looking forward to getting the CD.  Listening to it will help remind us of how awesome the worship was.

All of those things were definite pluses of the camp.  But if I had to choose what the best thing about the camp was, I would say that it was being able to be completely open with everyone who was there.  Because when you homeschool, and you're the only one who homeschools in your congregation, you have to be on guard to make sure that you don't offend those who don't homeschool.  I am in no way ashamed that we homeschool, but there are a lot of people that when I say, "We homeschool" they hear, "We homeschool and think that the public schools are evil and that if your children attend public school we think you are terrible parents."  Hubby and I don't feel that way.  We don't judge people for the decisions they make for their children.  But when we walk in to a new congregation who doesn't know us, they don't know that about us.  And honestly, most of them don't bother to find out more about why we homeschool so they continue with their pre-conceived ideas about us and our thoughts on homeschooling.  Which means that we have to watch what we say about homeschooling so that we don't offend anyone.

On the flip side, when we are with people in our homeschool group, I don't talk about church stuff.  We're a part of the homeschool groups for social reasons, not to talk religion.  So when we're with other homeschoolers we have to be on guard about not saying something that might cause conflict with others. 

At the camp we were there with other Church of Christ homeschoolers.  Our two worlds were finally combined and we didn't have to think about everything we said.  No one was judging us for homeschooling and no one was judging us for our religious beliefs.  We could be completely open with everyone we talked to without fear of offending them.  That was more freeing than I ever thought it would be.

We are definitely making plans to go back next year and as many years as we possibly can.  I can already tell this is going to be our new camp to look forward to every year. 

Weekly Wrap-Up: A Better Week and a Little Reality

So this week was better by far.  I'm still ready for a break, but we all made it through without tears.  And as it turns out, next week we are going to a homeschool camp up in  Oklahoma.  I'm trying to have a good attitude about the camp.  We were really excited about it at first, but a couple of things have happened that have made Hubby and I wonder if we're going to enjoy ourselves as much as we thought.  But as I was complaining about it yesterday Hubby told me that he was trying to have a better attitude about it since he was taking a week's worth of vacation to go.  He said that he felt like he needed to at least give it a try before deciding it was going to be bad.  Which of course made me realize that I needed to change my attitude as well.  Did y'all notice how he did that?  Told me that he was needing to change his attitude which also gently pointed out to me that I needed to change my attitude as well without coming right out and saying it.  He's one smart cookie, that husband of mine.  Of course, I knew exactly what he was doing because I am also a smart cookie, but since he did it correctly I was able to listen and follow his example instead of becoming hard headed and getting in an even more foul mood. 

This week was mostly school as usual for us.  #1 and #2 did write letters to our state senator and representative as part of their homework for TeenPact.  They were very impressed with the fact that they could so easily contact their representatives and to learn that their representatives are supposed to listen to them about different issues that come up.  Which is exactly what we want them to learn through these classes.  How government works and how they can make an impact in our government.  Hubby is actually going with them for their class.  Government is his passion and I think he'll enjoy the day as much as the girls.  Once we get back home they also are going to write a bill that is going to be presented to the class.  I passed that work off to Hubby right away.  I don't want/
need any extra work to do with the girls!

I'm learning something with #3.  With her math, I teach her a new concept on Monday and then the rest of the week she works on the worksheets that review the new concept as well as review previous concepts.  With #1 and #2, when they were in 1st grade I was still able to sit next to them as they did each worksheet and make sure they were doing every problem correct.  I'm not able to do that with #3.  When she is working on her math I'm working with one of the others girls on something else.  Usually I don't even pay much attention to whether or not she is using the blocks to help her.  She knows that she is allowed to answer the problems without using blocks if she understands how to do it.  The thing is, she is getting everything right.  I know when I'm teaching the new concept when she has gotten it.  Once she has I can literally let her go and work on her own and she can do it by herself.  She still occasionally asks for help, usually on word problems, but for the most part, she figures them out on her own.  This year with #1 and #2 it was a big deal to put so much independent work on their own shoulders.  But I'm learning that even as young as 1st grade they can be left alone to do independent work.  That's a nice revelation.  It makes a difference in the way I look at school work.  That I don't have to sit next to them for every little thing making sure everything is perfect as they go along.  I can give them some independence, when it's feasible, and trust them to get it right.  Or at least trust myself to know when they are getting something and when they need my help.  It's a nice thought when I look forward a couple of years to schooling 4 kids.

But I don't have to worry about that right now!  School is done for the week so I just have to focus on getting packed, spending some time with family and spending a week with a bunch of other weird homeschoolers!  Looking forward to the break!

P.S.  Remember my post a couple of weeks ago about being real with each other?  This was my kitchen one night last week.  It took three loads in the dishwasher to get it all cleared away.  And no, I did not wash anything by hand to get it done quicker and no, I did not help the girls with their chores of loading and unloading the dishwasher.  I left everything there until someone else took care of it.  And I am not ashamed!  :)

Weekly Wr--Oh, who cares?

I have hit a wall.  You know, the one where I question why I ever wanted to homeschool.  Where neither the girls nor I can seem to keep a good attitude for an entire day.  Where I have a hard time dragging myself out of bed in the morning because I know I have to start teaching as soon as I enter the living room. 

It happens every year.  And apparently it's a pretty common theme with homeschoolers.  The holidays are behind us, the weather isn't nice enough to play outside, and the end of the year isn't close enough to look forward to.  Although, when you think about it in those terms I wonder if teachers at public and private schools feel this way too. 

Whatever it is that causes it, I'm grumpy.  I'm not looking forward to school.  We get through every day by sheer force of will and someone ends up crying at least once a week.  It's bad enough that when I thought about writing about our school week I literally snarled my nose at myself. 

And then I remembered this post from the beginning of the year.  I re-read it.  And I sat and really thought about that memory.  And wonders of wonders, it worked.  Now, I'm not saying that I'm all happy and bubbly and wishing the week wasn't over, but I remember that beautiful moment, surrounded by my lovelies.  And I know deep down that this moment shall pass.  I'll climb over the stupid wall and get past it.  In fact, I had a nice visual.  Jesus at the top of the wall leaning down to give me a hands up.  Hubby right by my side cheering me on.  And the girls sitting on the sidelines, reading a book, every once in a while looking up to give a half-hearted cheer.  Because I may be encouraged, but positive thinking will only take you so far.

So to all the other homeschool Mamas out there who are having a hard time remembering why it's worth it, I feel your pain.  If you want to come over to my house we can sit on the couch with our arms crossed glaring at our beautiful children together.  And then we'll talk about why we chose to homeschool, and eventually we'll remember why we do it.  And it won't help the year move along any quicker, but maybe it'll help us get through each day a little easier!  And then, when we've survived until May, we'll have the most awesome end of school party that has ever happened! 

Sickness, a Birthday, and Insects

Baby Girl #2 turned 10 on Tuesday.  It wasn't the original plan, but she actually got to celebrate all week long.

On Tuesday Daddy made her some eggs for a quick breakfast and then I surprised the three oldest with a painting class.  It wasn't exactly what I thought it was going to be, but they all had a good time anyway. 

 The best part of course was getting to take the day off of school.  No school for anyone on birthdays around here!  Well, that was the best part for the rest of us.  The best part for #2 was a toss-up between getting to finally wear dangling earrings and getting to read Harry Potter.  Once they turn 10 is when those two things happen for our girls.  She's almost done with the first book and she hasn't worn anything but danglies since Tuesday!

And for her birthday dinner she chose CiCi's Pizza.  Ugh!  But we let them choose wherever they want to go (within reason) so CiCi's it was.  Complete with Mac and Cheese pizza.  One of my favorite pizza's there, actually!

On Thursday we went on a field trip to the Insecterium in New Orleans.  Our only time to actually go to NOLA since we've moved here.  Also the only time I've had to go through airport-like security to see a bunch of bugs.  But we got to see friends and eat some more chocolate covered bugs, so it was worth it. 

Of course crawfish are going to be on display!  Especially the blue ones!

Eating chocolate covered wax worms.  We're used to them now.

Can't forget these two!  Notice the one person not in the pictures eating a bug...

We thought he was going to be the only one to have one land on him

But #2 got lucky too

And since we were in New Orleans with friends we decided that we would take the girls down to a famous cafe to get some famous beignets.  First of all, we walked several blocks to get there.  We were in the downtown area and had already paid for parking for the day so we didn't want to try to move the vehicles and have to pay again.  Walking in crowds trying to keep track of 9 children was a little stressful for me.  But we made it in one piece.  We even got caught by a few street performers.  The girls enjoyed it even if I was slightly irritated having to put money in a terrible "magician's" hat.  But the beignets were really good and the time with friends was welcome.

Iced Cafe au Lait--it was humid!

Lovely magician--just lovely

After getting home I took #1 and #2 to get manicures.  This was one of the things #2 wanted for her birthday.  I was originally going to just take #2, but she asked if #1 could come too and since #1 has her own money to pay for it I agreed.  We had a good time.

Tonight #2 is actually going to get to open the rest of her gifts.  I failed to take in to account Valentine's Day and President's Day when I ordered her gifts so they didn't actually get here until yesterday.  Definitely another Mommy Fail to add to my list.  It won't be the last either!

And tomorrow she'll get her birthday breakfast, chocolate chip pancakes and turkey bacon.  So even though it didn't quite work out the way she wanted, I think it was still a pretty good week for her.

As far as school goes, we actually only did school work on Wednesday.  I woke up in the middle of the night Sunday night sick to my stomach and stayed that way for the rest of the day so school was cancelled.  Tuesday was off for the birthday, Thursday was the field trip, and Friday was co-op.  So we did part of school on Wednesday, and it wasn't really good for anyone.  I was still not feeling great so was cranky and short with the girls.  They couldn't seem to get in the school gear and kept messing around.  We didn't really get anything important covered.  And so we'll chalk this week up to "life experience" (because that sounds better than saying the week was wasted, although it really wasn't) and we'll move on. 

I'm looking forward to not having anywhere to go tomorrow.  I'll probably sleep as late as I can get away with.  And we'll be back on track for next week!

Keeping it Real and Paying it Forward

I was paid some nice compliments this last weekend about the girls and about my home.  They made me feel good.  Other people acknowledging the things that I have worked hard at let me think that maybe I'm actually doing something right.  But here's what I want everyone to know.  What you see on the outside is not real life.  For anyone! 

I have a friend who has more than double the number of children I do who takes food every Sunday night to share at their church.  She makes some really impressive dishes too. 

I have a sister-in-law who keeps her house up to my "company is coming" standard all the time.

There is a wonderful lady at church who remembers to send a card out for everyone's birthday.

My sister lost a lot of weight several years ago and has continued to keep it off since then. 

And I would love to say that I can look at these women and be happy for them that they are able to do these things.  But I sometimes struggle with the way that it makes me feel about my own limitations.

My friend who makes incredible food every week to share with her church family would never mess up on the venison pastries/pot pie/stew like I did this last week.

My sister-in-law would break out in hives if she saw the state of my kitchen right now. 

I didn't even bother to get my husband a valentine's day card, even after he surprised me with chocolates and a warm blanket.

I can't garner the will power I need to shed any weight.

The thing is, I know I'm not the only Mom who does that either.  We were talking with some friends of ours and discussing how social media has really done us a disservice by allowing people to hide behind this online persona.  The Mom who posts about how much she loves her kids but never says a word about bursting in to tears when they wrote on the furniture.  The wife who says how much she loves her husband but never admits that they are arguing more than they used to and she doesn't know why.  The person who posts amazing pictures from the awesome vacation they took but keeps quiet about the debt they've accrued. 

Now, I'm not saying that you should air your dirty laundry for everyone to see it either.  Online etiquette is a whole 'nother subject.  I just think that we should be more real with people.  Not be afraid to let others see the chinks in our armor. 

But how best to go about this without walking around talking about how your kids drive you crazy, or how the remodel set you back more than you expected, or that if your husband doesn't pluck that eyebrow that keeps sticking out that you're going to do it for him while he sleeps?

What if when another Mom compliments you on how well behaved your children are that you say, "Thanks!  It's a lot of hard work, so it's nice to hear that it's paying off."  Or when a Mom says she wishes her house looked as nice as yours that you say, "Trust me, this is not the lived in look we usually have."  What about every once in a while taking a picture of your living room that is filled with toys and books and miscellaneous crayons and posting it with #reallife. 

It's not about putting yourself down to make other people feel better.  We should never feel like we have to do that.  It's about giving small clues to let other people know that what they see on the surface is not the whole picture.  It's about letting other Moms know that you struggle with the same things they do.  It's about showing your behind-the-scenes and not just your highlight reel.

There is a flip side to this subject though.  What if we started handing out compliments like crazy?  Since we know that other Moms struggle with feeling inadequate or like they're screwing up their kids for life, what if we showered each other with encouraging words and compliments?  What if you went out of your way to tell a Mom that you're impressed with how well her children handle themselves when talking with an adult.  Or that you've noticed how much one of their children has a great sense of humor.  Or how amazing it is that they were able to come home after working and make a good looking meal for their family.  What if Moms who have older kids tell those with younger children that they are doing a good job, even though it doesn't feel like it. 

How would you feel if other people told you those kinds of things?  Is it possible that if you constantly had people telling you that you were doing a good job that you just might stop comparing yourself to others?  That instead you might be more confident in doing what you do best and being happy for everyone else who is doing their best too?  How many aspects of your life would it affect?   What if you could do that for someone else?  We could change the world, y'all! 

Weekly Wrap-up: The one where we start preschool and a co-op

I'm not a big believer in preschool for my girls.  I know some homeschoolers spend time and money on a preschool curriculum, but I've always felt like reading a book about the alphabet to my 4 year old was just as good as sitting at a table and working on flashcards with them.  And I still think that.  Except that now I have a lot less time to sit and read those alphabet books with my 3, almost 4 year old than I did with any of the other girls.  And to be perfectly honest, all the pretty educational books we got with #1 have either been so used that they got dumped or they are lost somewhere in the sea of books we own.  So I dug out a set of flashcards to start working with #4.  Note:  This has nothing to do with the fact that the girls' cousin who is 6 months younger than #4 can already write her name.  Because I'm a veteran Mom and I don't compare myself to other parents anymore!  Anyway, while looking online for some coloring pages for #4 I came across this website.  An all-in-one homeschool curriculum, starting with preschool.  A big fat kudos to this woman.  She has spent countless hours putting all this together and offers it for free to anyone who wants to use it.  So even though I still wouldn't spend money or much time on a preschool education for my almost 4 year old, I can sit and work through 5 minutes a day with her--especially since it is free.  #4 seems to be enjoying it.  So I've decided that now when people ask I'll tell them I'm teaching all 4 girls.  Maybe if I tell myself that often enough, when #4 actually starts kindergarten I'll be used to it and won't need to freak out!

We also had our first day of co-op today.  I've missed being a part of a co-op since we've been here.  I've missed being able to be around other Moms every week and for my girls to be able to be taught something that I wouldn't teach them at home.  We've still been doing 4 day weeks because Hubby has Fridays off so we don't do school on Fridays, but we haven't had anything specific to do on Fridays.  So when the opportunity arose to join this co-op we decided to take it.  #4 is young enough that she is still in the nursery, but the other three girls are in a choir, #1 is taking cooking and storytelling, #2 is taking science and drama, and #3 is taking cooking and a lego class.  They all had a blast today.  #4 still had trouble when I left her in the nursery, but she was fine after just a few minutes.  It's too early to tell if we'll stay with the co-op next year, especially since my plans for a homeschool choir are starting to fall in to place, but we will enjoy this semester while we are a part of it!

As far as the more mundane, regular school, I am still finishing about an hour earlier than I did last semester.  I attribute this to not doing language arts with #1 and not doing IEW with #2.  I like being done earlier with the older girls because that gives me a chance to take the time to listen to #3 read or read to her and to take time to teach #4 a little bit.  The oldest two are still working right up till lunch and #1 averages about 30 minutes after lunch, but as long as I'm done earlier what do I care when they get done?  I'm kidding!

And #3 started subtraction this week.  Or as she keeps calling it, division.  I love the way that Math-U-See has them solve for the unknown (x + 5 = 8) from the beginning of addition so that when it comes time to do subtraction they are so used to solving for the unknown that it isn't difficult for them to understand subtraction at all. 

#1 wanted to write her 3 paragraph paper by hand this week.  I told her she could as long as she understood that if she made any mistakes on her final draft that she would probably have to re-write the entire thing.  She only made 3 mistakes on the final draft, but since two of them were leaving words out completely she opted to type the paper again instead of writing it all out again.  Can't imagine why!  Which reminds me of a question I thought about this week.  When do kids start using pens in school?  I can't remember at all when I started using a pen for everything except math.  Homeschool problems, y'all!

So tonight we're going to bake a couple of pizzas and chill with a movie.  It has been a great week!

The Finale!

Our little object lesson is now complete--praise the Lord!  I'm super glad that my brother and his family came to see us anyway, but the fact that we "had" to cut out two more meals of PB&J makes them coming even better.  It was all Hubby and I could do at lunch yesterday to get the sandwich down!

So how did it go?  I think we got the point across very well.  As soon as lunch was cleaned up we called #1 in our room and talked to her about it.  We explained that the lesson wasn't so much for her as it was for her sisters and that even though she doesn't always remember to do her chores that we were very proud of how well she does with remembering.  And then we praised her for having a good attitude and that even though we could tell that she was irritated with us on Tuesday when we didn't eat until 8 that she was never rude or disrespectful.  We also told her that we proud of the way that she directs her sisters when she needs to and how she has started to gently remind them when they need to get things done as well.  She cried, but she started crying before we even said anything.  That is just how she is.  And that is why we talked to her separately!

After talking to her we sat down with all the girls in the living room and called our family meeting to order.  We asked how they felt when we didn't feed them until 8 on Tuesday.  #3 said she felt hungry.  That is the only emotion she could recall when thinking about that night.  After prompting #2 and telling her that she could be honest with us and we wouldn't get upset she told us that she felt like we weren't doing a good job as parents because we didn't feed them when they got hungry.  In my mind I was thinking, "Oh yeah!"  #1 also piped up and said she felt ignored.  

So then we asked how they felt eating PB&J for the last four meals.  #3 said she thought it was awesome.  Of course she did.  We could have gone another week without her thinking anything about it.  #2 said again that she didn't think we were doing a good job because we wouldn't go to the store to get food.

And then we brought the lesson home.  We talked about how because Mommy didn't do her job of fixing dinner and going grocery shopping that it affected the entire family.  We said that even though they don't think that loading or unloading the dishwasher makes a difference to the family, that it does.  When one person doesn't get their job done, it affects everyone.  We also explained that this lesson wasn't just about chores, that we were training them to be responsible adults.  That when they had a job or when they were running their own household that there wouldn't be anyone to remind them to get things done.  We also explained that we wanted them to be the type of people that others can rely on.  That when they say they will get something done that others know they can be relied upon to do what they said they would.  We got tears from #1 and #3, but #2 remained stoic.  Basically exactly the reactions we were expecting.

After we tore them down so to speak we built them back up.  We told them how impressed we were that there was not one word of complaint with any of the meals we had.  We also told them that even though we wanted to teach them this lesson that it didn't mean that we thought that they were bad kids.  We told them we were so happy with the young women they were developing in to and how thankful we were that they were our girls.  And we are!  Our children aren't perfect by any means, but they are really excellent kids. We also told them that we weren't going to talk about punishment if they didn't do their chores.  That we trusted them enough to know that because we had talked to them about how important getting their chores done was that they would do them now.  I'm hoping that expressing that trust makes them more willing to take responsibility for them. 

All in all, I think the lesson went really well.  I'm fairly certain that any time we mention peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for the next year or so that they will remember this particular lesson.  As far as actually making a difference in whether they remember their chores or not--well, I'll update on that after a couple of weeks! 

Whose bright idea was this?

Seriously though?  Three straight meals of PB&J is two too many!  Want to know something funny though?  The girls were so excited that they had crunchy peanut butter in the house that they all had toast with peanut butter on it for breakfast.  When they told me that at lunch I had to walk away I was laughing so hard.  I don't think they'll be having it for breakfast tomorrow!

We are having to cut our little object lesson short.  Turns out my brother and his family are going to come and see us this weekend.  And since I can barely tolerate this much PB&J, I am definitely not going to subject anyone else to it.  So we're going to end after lunch tomorrow.  But the lesson will still be learned.

 How do I know this? #2, the one who most needed this little lesson, has detested eating the sandwiches almost as much as I have.  She hasn't said a word, other than asking if she could have meat and cheese instead, but she looks like she's about to throw up the entire time she's eating it.  Success!  And before you start to think I'm horrible, the kid is a food snob.  Not picky because she'll eat anything, but if she decides she doesn't like something she'll act like it's torture to eat it.

All the girls asked me at some point today if I was going shopping.  #2 asked if I needed to thaw out chicken.  I made it a point to tell them I needed to go shopping.  And then I told them that I didn't really feel like going.  And then when I was making dinner I reiterated that I was busy this afternoon and didn't feel like going shopping.  The older two especially seemed a little disgusted with me when I made comments about not really wanting to go to the store or being busy.  I think they could see that I was just being lazy doing my own thing instead of going shopping.  This is a good thing--exactly what I wanted them to pick up on.

I have to admit that I am pleasantly surprised at the lack of complaining that we've had.  Actually, there hasn't been any complaining.  Not even a moan when I said that we were doing PB&J again.  It's nice to see that in the midst of a lesson we're teaching the girls that we can see that some of our other lessons have paid off!  It's entirely possible if we carried this out as long as originally planned there would be complaining, but if we can get through 4 straight meals of these sandwiches without a complaint I will count that as a success!

So the plan is to go ahead with lunch tomorrow as our last meal with PB&J and then sit them down shortly after and talk about everything we learned.  Don't forget that we also had dinner at 8 on Tuesday night as part of the lesson.  Hubby and I just might be taking bets about who cries first.  Again--not terrible parents, just parents of four girls!  I'll let you know how it goes tomorrow!

Phase One: Complete

We have now completed phase one of "Teaching a Lesson They Won't Soon Forget".  Tonight's agenda was to close ourselves off in our room until 8 and "forget" to make dinner.  It went about the way I thought it would.  Disbelief when we said we were going to start a movie at 5, the time I normally start making dinner, and several questions about when we were going to eat.  Some of the questions were:

"What's for dinner?"
"Can I help you make dinner?"
"Are we going to eat soon?"
"Do you know what time it is?"

The last one was from #1 right at 8.  I heard a distinct sigh--through our door--when we replied we'd get to dinner eventually.  I almost couldn't stop smiling when we finally came out.  #1 was extremely irritated with us.  #2 and #3 just followed us around the kitchen until we had the food on the table.  Apparently they were hungry.  We did feed #4 at 6:30 since we didn't really think she was old enough to have to wait until 8 to eat.  But she ate with us again. 

We did allow a little bit more than just cheese and crackers.  Not a terrible looking dinner, but since this looks a lot like what we have for lunch most days, it isn't a favorite for any of us. 

To their credit, we heard no complaints.  #2 asked if she could have a PB&J instead, but didn't say anything when we told her no.  And even though we could tell #1 was irritated with us, she never once gave us any attitude or said anything in an ugly manner.  We will be complimenting her on having control over her emotions and showing respect even when upset. 

The best part of tonight?  I wanted to drive home the point that we were eating this late because we were watching movies, not because something important was going on.  So as we were clearing the table I told them I was sorry about dinner, that Daddy and I just got caught up watching our movie.  I was met with dead silence.  I couldn't risk looking at them because I was afraid I would start laughing, so I missed any facial expressions, but the silence said it all! 

If they only knew what they are in for the rest of the week!

Operation Object Lesson is in the Works

I'm not going to lie.  Plotting with the Hubby about how to cause the most heartache in our children was just a little bit fun.

See, our girls are good kids.  Through the grace of God we've gotten some things right in training them up.  But since they're not functioning adults yet we still have work to do.  Right now the biggest issue that needs to be addressed is teaching them to take responsibility of their chores and other jobs so that I'm not constantly having to remind them to get them done.

I had a great system figured out.  Actually, it is still a great system, they're just not using it right.  I have a separate sheet of paper printed for each of the older three with a list of their chores and what day they need to get them done on.  For example, vacuuming the rugs on Tuesday and Fridays or cleaning the bathroom on Wednesdays.  These sheets are in plastic covers so that they can get a dry erase marker and check off when they get a chore done so they can easily see what still needs to be done.  Smart, right?  Don't think too highly of me--I got the idea off of Pinterest.

This system worked great for the first several weeks.  Sheets were being consulted, boxes were being checked, and chores were getting done with enthusiasm!  My list maker self was happy!  After about 2 months though the boxes weren't really being checked any more.  I was OK with this.  I would hope that after that amount of time they would be able to remember what they were supposed to do on any given day.  Soon after I noticed that the sheets weren't being consulted much either.  Again, I was OK with it.  As long as they remembered what they were supposed to do I didn't care if my system was being used.

We were gone a lot this last summer so after the first couple of weeks back in school when Hubby and I noticed that chores weren't being done at all we had a family meeting where we reminded the girls that they have a responsibility to the family to help everything run smoothly.  We also changed up some of the responsibilities. That helped for a while because they had to go back to checking their sheets to remember what the new jobs were. 

But then they started slacking again.  So we started implementing punishment for not getting their chores done.  For example if the dust mopping wasn't done by the time Daddy got home at 5:30 then that child would be doing the extra sweeping as well as dust mopping for a week.  We did have to doll out punishments to all three of the girls for different things.  It didn't take more than about two times of extra work being piled on for them to get the hint and start getting it done when they were supposed to.

The problem during all of this is that I would "help" the girls along by reminding them that they might want to get their chores completed.  Or just asking if they got something done.  Or flat out telling them to go do it right now.  I can't even remember all the times I've reminded them about something and they'll say, "Yeah, I know," and then get so busy doing their own thing that they don't get it done.  And it's gotten worse.  I'm now constantly reminding them or asking them about their chores.  Chores that by now they should have memorized what they are supposed to do when. 

There are several problems with this.  First of all, the reason I came up with my chore system was so that I wouldn't  have to think about the girls' chores at all.  Once I had them down on paper they should be able to read it and get it done without me having to constantly remember what they're supposed to be doing on any given day.  Once I had it written out for them I emptied that space in my brain to fill with other necessary information.  Like what I'm making for dinner tonight or what day I'm supposed to do laundry.  Honestly, some days I feel like if I have to remember one more thing Hubby is going to come home and find my head has exploded.  And then the girls will have the chore of cleaning my brain matter off the ceiling.  Secondly, when they get a job their employer will not be reminding them what they have to get done and when it needs to be done by.  At least not more than once or twice.  I also think that not getting their chores done shows a lack of respect for the authority of their father and I.  There needs to be a level of respect that if we tell them to do something it gets done without a reminder.

So Hubby and I have been thinking about how we can get this lesson across.  Reminders and punishment haven't worked on a long term basis.  Allowances are given as a way to teach good money management so we don't take them away as punishment.  Plus, we don't pay the girls to get their chores done.  They do chores because they're a part of the family, not because we pay them for it.

What we finally decided was that we needed to show the girls how them not doing their chores affects the entire family.  They have been given chores to do because they are a part of this family, and everyone needs to do their part in order for the family to run smoothly.  So we are going to show them what happens when Mommy "forgets" to do her job.  Or when I get caught up doing something I enjoy and get my job done late.
Tomorrow night Hubby is going to come home and we're going to watch a movie in our room.  They won't be invited to join us, they'll have to figure out something to do on their own.  Then, because I'm doing something for myself, I'm going to forget to make dinner.  When they remind me about it, as I'm sure they will be often, I'll just tell them I'll do it in a little bit.  Something I hear quite often from them.  The end result is that dinner is going to be cheese and crackers at around 8 p.m.  Hubby wanted dinner to be skipped completely, but I thought that might be a bit much. 

And then Thursday, Friday, and Saturday we will be eating peanut butter and jelly for lunch and dinner because I'm going to forget to go grocery shopping.  (For the record, Hubby and I both really dislike PB&J.  This isn't going to be fun for us either).  When they ask about food we already have I'll tell them it's for another meal, but since I don't have all the ingredients I can't make it.  When they remind me that I need to go shopping I'm going to say something about being busy, or I'll go in a little while, or I don't feel like it right now.  When they complain about the peanut butter and jelly we'll remind them to be thankful we have food to eat.  We're determined that this will be something they won't soon forget. 

Hubby and I were laughing a lot while plotting this plan.  We've already figured out the logistics of where we'll hide our snacks to sneak throughout the day.  Or how long we'll have to wait after they go to bed to get Taco Bell without them smelling it.  We might have actually cackled and rubbed our hands together when we decided we would write their favorite meals down on our menu for them to see knowing full well we wouldn't be fixing them.  We're not evil, but any parent will tell you that sometimes it feels like you're in a battle with your children.  This is a war we don't intend to lose!  If we can do it with a flare that will make them remember it longer, even better!

Our girls are pretty smart so I expect them to figure out what is going on before Saturday night.  But we're going to carry it all the way through.  And Saturday night we'll have another family meeting and we'll talk about what we all learned.   Hopefully this is the last time we'll have to demonstrate the importance of getting chores done.  If it doesn't work I just might resort to showing them pictures of brain matter and explaining how hard it will be to clean off our ceiling!

Weekly Wrap-Up: The first full week back

This week was our first full week back.  We did a couple of days last week, but they weren't too eventful since we didn't do any extra work like science or geography.  I find it is better for all of us to ease back in to school instead of starting full force!

This year is actually the first year that I have sat down and figured out exactly how many days or weeks we're going to need to get finished with everything.  I've usually just gone through the book and stopped when we get to the end of the year.  It's never been a problem before now.  Usually we end up finishing almost everything ahead of time anyway.  But Mystery of History is set up to have exactly 18 weeks each semester and I wanted to make sure we finished it this year, hence my taking a little more time to figure out how much time we needed for everything.  My results were:

18 weeks of History
16 weeks for science
16 weeks for Bible
15 weeks for #1's IEW
15 weeks for all 3 in math
15 weeks for #3's First Language Lessons
14 weeks for #2's First Language Lessons
14 weeks for geography

All in all I was happy with the progress we made last semester.  My only issue with history needing 18 weeks is that technically we'll only be doing school work for 16 weeks.  However, the nice thing with MOH is that a lot of the work involved with it is the quizzes and tests after every 3 lessons.  You take those away and the actual reading part doesn't involve much.  So I get to pick a couple of weeks that the girls don't have to worry about the tests and just double up on reading.  Not a problem!

So moving past my need to have a list for everything I do--this week was a good week.  I found myself being done teaching earlier than last semester.  Only by about 30 minutes, but I still noticed it.  I chalk it up to the fact that we've switched so that #1 is doing IEW now and #2 is doing FLL.  #1 has been doing IEW for longer so she requires much less teaching on my part.  In fact, she wrote her entire paragraph this week starting with an outline without me doing anything except proof-reading her paper.  I even had her proof-read it first so I could see if she would notice any mistakes she had made on her own.  I was glad to see that she did correct several things on her own so that I only had to help her fix two grammatical errors.  Still can't say enough how much I love IEW!

We also implemented another policy with #1 that she now has to write down her math problems on her answer sheet that I grade as well as her workbook where she works on the problem.  I saw a pattern that most of the problems she missed was from reading the problem wrong or not clearly understand what she was supposed to do instead of her not knowing how to do the problem.  There was a marked improvement once she started writing the problems down.  I hated to do anything to add to the amount of time it takes her to get her math done since she already spends so much time on it, but since it made such a big difference we are sticking with the new format.

#2 is sailing right along in all subjects.  Her printing is still atrocious, despite me making her take an extra year before learning cursive.  Her cursive is very pretty because she has to go slow and take her time.  She gets to writing so fast when she prints that it is just a mess.  I've about decided to let it go though.  Honestly, how much will she be writing by hand when she grows up?  As long as she can read it, and I know she can have good handwriting if she takes her time I am almost past caring.  Almost!

#3 is finally starting to get to where she likes to read more.  I was really sad for a while because it seemed that she wasn't fostering a love of reading like my older two.  But now that she is getting better at reading and doesn't require hardly any help with any words I find her reading on her own more.  Yay!  I'm not sure I would know what to do with a kid who I had to remind to read!

And I just realized a few days ago that I'll be needing to order Pre-K stuff for #4 next year.  I don't believe in a "formal" curriculum for Pre-K, but there are some nice workbooks that I have found by Rod and Staff that are good for them to learn from without sitting for any great length of time.  I started freaking out a little at the thought of having to be teaching all 4 in a couple of years, but I shoved the thought to the back of mind and I refuse to think about it for at least 8 more months.  After writing it down on here of course...

So that was our week.  I am still amazing sometimes when I see how well everything is going that I actually feel like I have a handle on this homeschool thing now.  I remember feeling overwhelmed all the time when the girls were younger, constantly feeling like I didn't know what I was doing.  This is honestly the first year I haven't felt that way.  It's a nice feeling!    

The last 3 weeks. Or so....

I was super busy our entire break, unlike anyone else I'm sure.  But I do want to show what all happened while we were off of school, so I decided to do it through pictures.  But my mother has informed me that sometimes the pictures I send to her don't make much sense without some explanation.  So I'll provide as brief a description as possible.

While trying to make some Christmas gifts I sat at a different place at the school table than I normally sit at.  It's kind of hard to see, but one of the daughters had carved several things into the varnish.  One of which is the word "Mom".  Since #1 admitted it was her and that is where she sits when I teach her math, I'm about 97% certain that "Mom" was not written with love.

The parental units came to town which meant date night for Hubby and I.  I even wore heels.  It was momentous enough to warrant a picture.

Grandpa was also here for Christmas and his chosen activity with the girls was seeing how high they could build a domino tower.  #1 came in second to my Mom.  If you're wondering if they quietly took down all the dominoes you don't know my Grandpa.  Or my Mom.  And you probably don't have children because that is a silly question when you have kids.  It's amazing how sound carries when your entire house is tile.

My Mom has this huge collection of Christmas earrings.  Which I give her a hard time about because some of them could be worn to tacky sweater parties.  She brought them all.  And corrupted my girls by letting them wear some.  And then she made me wear some also.  And my girls loved every second of it.

Now that we've finally been let in on the secret of Coffee Call, we take everyone who comes to see us there.  We were smart this time and got the beignet fingers.  Still good and 10 times easier to eat.  Also notice the sippy cup.  The three older girls all came down with a fever, one right after the other.  Nothing too terrible, just a general not feeling well.  Thankfully everyone was well before Christmas.

I am finally good enough at playing 42 that I feel comfortable playing with my Grandpa.  So we did.  I always forget that the way old men play includes gripping about every hand, but I remembered rather quickly!  I really do think that every older gentleman I've ever played with has played that way.

Christmas morning.  This is as close to a posed picture as I cared to try to get.

Yay!  Presents!

#1 and #2 got Kindle readers for their big gift.  No way were we getting them anything with internet access or something to play apps on, but we figured that we travel enough that an e-reader made sense.  And Hubby pointed out that if we only got one for them to share that they would have to be constantly working out a system of what was fair and who got it when.  I thought it was an excellent point, so they each got their own.

And this is where she immediately went to start reading!

Hubby got me a new phone for Christmas.  Well, it was a used one, but new to me.  He knew I would not be happy to have him spend $400 on a phone for me.  Anyway, the first thing I did with my new phone was take a picture of him! 

I also got a Cricut Mini which I love and am super excited about!  This was the first "sample" project you can make with it.  That says thank you if you can't read it.

We finally got our cuckoo clock put up.  It's really my in-law's, but they don't have a house to put it in so we got it so they can see it when they come visit.  We'll get it to actually keep time correctly one of these days.

I used my new sewing machine A LOT to make different things for people.  It was fun!

I finished my cross-stitch piece for my new nephew.  It ended up being bigger than I wanted since I came up with the patterns myself instead of buying one, but other than that I thought it turned out well.  I have a nice sister-in-law who puts my creations for her kids up without saying anything, even if she doesn't really like them!  I'm most proud of the badge in the upper right corner--it looks a lot like his Daddy's badge. 

Our first fire in the house for New Year's Eve

Putting the ornaments on the tree is my favorite part of decorating for Christmas.  Each one holds a memory.  Putting them up isn't too bad either.  Mainly because I love figuring out how to get all the different boxes to fit in the container.  I might have a little bit of OCD.  Or just love Tetris--either one.

We got to meet my nephew CD.  This is the only picture I have of him because I was holding him most of the time!  Love babies--especially my nieces and nephews.

No special significance to this picture, they're just all so cute.  Stinkers--but cute!

#3 turned 7.  We were traveling on her actual birthday, but she got to go to her favorite Mexican food place once we got to my parents'.  She requested the hat and singing this time.  Sometimes I feel bad that we almost always celebrate #3's birthday around our extended family's Christmas, but then I remember that at least she gets to be around family on her birthday.  The other girls rarely have that.  So don't feel too bad for her.  She usually rakes in more gifts that way too!

Uncle M taught us cool things like how to make a mask out of a slice of turkey and put it on our face

 Aunt U makes up for Uncle M by playing picnic with the little girls.  Because she's cool like that!

Uncle M is not the only one who corrupts in our family.  I taught my niece the joy of sticking olives on your fingers and eating them off.  And her Daddy can't do anything about it!  Ha!

My child already knew how it was done!

We brought my niece, who is 6 months younger than #4, with us to my parents house for a few days before her parents and brother joined us.  I got a small taste of what it would be like having twins.  I have not stopped thanking God for giving my girls to me one at a time since!

It was so cold this day, but we bundled up and walked down to a little frozen pond to see if we could break through the ice by throwing rocks.  Amazingly enough, a piece of gravel, thrown by a 3 year old, from several yards up did not break the ice.

Uncle M and Aunt U are awesome because they help the kids climb down to the frozen pond so they can get closer to try to break the ice.  When that doesn't work Uncle M holds their hands and lets them get out on the ice.  I did not take any pictures of those moments.

 Getting ready for our annual scavenger hunt.  Dad did it by himself this year without Mom's help.  Let's just say the clues were interesting!  And there was absolutely no cheating!  Like sticking the envelopes under a log where they couldn't be seen.  Because our family does not act like that at all!

This, friends, is just one of many reasons being part of a large family rocks.  There were almost this many on the other side of the tree. 

The gift from all of us to Mom and Dad this year.  A friend at church who can actually paint painted the trees for me and then each of our families used our fingerprints to make the leaves on the trees.  So the first one is my older brother and his wife, the second one is my family's, the third is my sister and her husband, etc.  And yes, that one lone leaf on the orange tree is supposed to be there.  People who know my family can figure out which kid that is and they'll knowingly nod their head.  Wouldn't have him any other way!  :)

So that was our break.  We were busy and started school a little later because of traveling to see family, but it was totally worth it!  I'm so thankful for the time we got to spend with everyone.  But it was good to get back too.  We're looking forward to getting back in the swing of things!